ACTIVE ADDICTS NOT IN RECOVERY ATTEMPT SEVERAL METHODS TO AVOID RESPONSIBILITY FOR THEIR BEHAVIORS and INTIMACY
They attempt to use deception, denial, rationalization, justification, entitlement, playing victim, minimizing what they did, minimizing and invalidating your needs or emotions, blaming you or anything else, gaslighting (manipulating you to doubt your own reality) promises to stop or get help and then they don't intend to follow through.
Your best defense is BOUNDARIES and specialized betrayal trauma support from specially trained therapists or coaches, education, and a support group of people who are in the same situation as you. Recovery for the addicted person is possible, and those behaviors subside and stop in real recovery, if they want recovery and are willing to do the work.
See our Module 2: Boundaries Basics: How to Create, Communicate and Enforce Boundaries with a Sexually Addicted Spouse
Module 7: Dealing With the Toxic Things My Sexually Addicted Partner Says and Does