I'm a woman recovering from intimate betrayal trauma, and I'd love to meet you and share my story of how I Recovered Peace.

I can help you avoid common mistakes that I myself and many others have made on this journey, and help you navigate what at first, seems to be a daunting and confusing path.

Take courage, dear friend - recovering your peace is possible, regardless of the path your partner chooses. If salvaging your relationship is also your goal is, I can provide insight and guidance on how best to approach this, while protecting your heart.

One person holding another person's hand in support and encouragement. Symbolic of betrayal trauma coaching.

My online persona: Wysteria Veritas

Define: veritas - >noun Latin1. truth.

About my coaching

I've been in a loving relationship for 27 years, and  married to my husband  for 25. We have an awesome college age son who continues to be the light of our life. I'm from Illinois originally, and my husband from the Philadelphia area, but we currently reside on the Gulf Coast of Florida and are deeply immersed in a recovery lifestyle that we love.

But it wasn't easy getting here, and we made plenty of mistakes, and missteps over the years. We hope to share the lessons learned from those mistakes, to hopefully save other people unnecessary pain, confusion and maybe even loss. 

I have experienced intimate partner betrayal repeatedly over the years, due to my husband's sexual addiction.

I knew I was smart, and certainly had a level of self awareness from therapy throughout the years. My husband, whom I loved, was my best friend and we got along fine. I made allowances for the behaviors that I knew of, because he "had a bad childhood" or "he's a guy".  I knew something deeper was wrong, and just couldn't put my finger on it. I suspected. I snooped. I spied. I cried, pleaded and begged. Even though my husband made concessions and small confessions, I knew deep down there was something more. I just couldn't figure out what. My gut feelings, didn't line up with my "reality". I found ways to cope - mostly unhealthy.

After many confusing discoveries over the years, and my husband's genuine remorse each time,  in 2010 after life-shattering discovery, I finally had a name for the craziness that I was feeling: betrayal trauma. My husband finally had a name for his behaviors and personal hell: sex addiction. We began to learn about recovery from each. But we still made mistakes.

In 2017, we finally had it right: The right therapists, the right support groups, the right sponsors, the right recovery community and most of all: the right attitudes for recovery. The gifts of recovery for my husband, myself and our marriage have been an incredible and exciting surprise.

I've led local recovery support groups, and moderated online support groups and book studies of over 1600 members, for over 2 years. I've seen and heard quite a few stories, some mild, some quite shocking like my own.

I'm a Certified Life Coach, and will begin training in January of 2020 with Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists (APSATS) in the Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model. My goal is to become an APSATS Certified Partner Coach (CPC).

If you need someone who understands what it feels like to be in a relationship with someone you love, but who has (or you suspect has) sex or porn addiction, please reach out to me for conversation about hope. Hope for your own personal recovery, and potentially the recovery of the relationship you value. I understand the crazy. I understand the shock. I know the way to sanity and to Recovered Peace. 

Even more about me, Pam...