Example Boundary Document for During and After Separation

This boundary document is very comprehensive and came about as a result of a serious relapse. Boundaries and recovery were not new ideas to my spouse, but no matter, this was his last chance to save our
marriage and two parent family. I left nothing to chance.

I hit the  addiction hard and heavy with minute details. This was sink or swim. If he couldn’t stick to consistent recovery, I had to be out for my own health – physical, mental, spiritual and emotional.
I regret not having a detailed, comprehensive boundary document like this, the first time I verified deception and betrayal.

I regret that I let go of enforcement of many of these boundaries the first time, because I wanted “everything to go back to normal.” It was a mistake, as there was no going back to a normal that never really existed.

My spouse thanks me for setting these boundaries, because as a result, he finally took his recovery seriously, knowing that if he didn’t honor them, I was going to extend the separation in consideration of divorce.
These boundaries are very personal to me, my values, and my husband’s typical MO in the addiction.

You can add/delete/change to fit your situation, your fears, and what behaviors will help you feel safe, seen, heard and known, and your needs for what means “safety” to you.

Download PDF Document: Example Boundary Document for During and After Separation