boundaries-for-clarity-and-peace-course (1)

Open for Enrollment:

Boundaries for Clarity and Peace

Transform Your Relationship with Your Sexually Addicted Spouse from Conflict and Chaos into Love and Compassion without Guilt.

The most comprehensive program for creating and enforcing boundaries with your sexually addicted spouse, with love and compassion.


Who This Is Really For…

You’re in a relationship that you’ve protected and cherished, with a sexually addicted partner  but you’re simply tired of hoping your spouse will change so you can finally relax.

You're ready to protect your heart, sanity and relationship rights by speaking confidently, from a loving and place.

Whether you’re a wife who …

  • just recently learned about your spouse’s deception and betrayals and you don’t know where to start
  • has known about your husband’s behaviors for a long time, but keeps hearing promises to change, but yet nothing ever really changes
  • has been in recovery for a while now, but the trust and connection level is low or non-existent and you know, “something is missing”

You’re in the right place
and I’m going to tell you exactly how Boundaries for Clarity and Peace will give you the mindset, tools and unparalleled support on your journey to creating peace and sanity in your relationship with your sexually addicted spouse.

Be the end of this program you will have:

  • A strong awareness of the priceless value of what you’re protecting with boundaries.

  • Nailed down your personal intimate relationship boundaries (instead of wondering, “can I have a boundary around _______?”


  • Crafted your detailed action plan for boundary enforcement so you know exactly what you will do, and exactly how you will do it


  • Communicated your boundaries in the most loving and compassionate way while maintaining firm self confidence that what you’re protecting is of the highest value


  • Have responses ready to any objections or pushback, gaslighting or manipulation so you’re ready to stand firm against any attempt to get you to drop your boundary pre-maturely – before his new behaviors take shape


  • Crafted personal boundaries that protect your physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual and sexual self-care


  • Implement better boundaries with everyone else: children, parents, siblings, other family members, coworkers, bosses, neighbors, therapists, church leaders – anyone at all.

Enroll in Boundaries for Clarity and Peace Today






I’ve done other support groups, seen CSATs, gone to counseling .. but this has by far been the best help that I have found. Pam has lived this trauma and really cares. She will share her story and what works and what hurts. I can not recommend her and this tribe of supportive woman who know this pain enough ! It’s a safe place with others who really understand and will tell you the truth. You will feel seen, heard, cared for, and valued. Do this for yourself – it is life changing."

Kathleen T
Maryland, US

"Setting and more importantly, holding our boundaries, can be overwhelming and confusing. Pam breaks it down to it’s simplest form, with easy and relatable examples that can be applied to our own unique circumstances. She truly gets it and you will too!"

Ontario, Canada

"Your Kindness, support and education offered me not only a place to feel sane and safe when I felt so confused and alone— but also you gave me hope to improve. You did this by teaching me about boundaries, about what I deserved and reminded me I am my own person— and I get to do it in my own way and own time."

Maine, US

"After 30 years of a whole lot of recovery programs, counselors and a plethora of money I gave up looking. That is until I found Pam and her  Boundaries education and community.  I now have others who understand, community support and solid answers for making and keeping boundaries...regardless of whether our loved one chooses recovery or not. And boundaries are great for friends and family too! INVALUABLE."

Cathy C.

"I now feel like a stronger individual because of her. I’ve learned stronger healthier boundaries, learned how to stay focused on my own personal growth, skills for helping my trauma states and just generally how to grow into a healthier person."
- J.B., British Columbia

Jeneanne B.
British Columbia, Canada

"If you had told me 6 months ago, that my marriage could be better than ever, more close, more connected, more safe, I would have said it was impossible. Even setting and enforcing boundaries seemed like an impossible task. But Pam helped me to understand that I wasn't being mean, controlling or hard, but that my boundaries were an act of love. Now my children are learning to set boundaries and I couldn't be more proud. 

Maria S.
New Jersey

What's Inside
Boundaries for Clarity and Peace

Module 1: Myths, Change and Mindset

Here’s why it pays to learn from someone who’s gone before you – I know exactly where most people get stuck when learning to use boundaries. In this module we’re going to:

  • Crush the myths that keep us from using our boundaries to keep us safe, sane and secure.
  • Expose and demolish fears that can keep us stuck in place.
  • Change our mindset to one that will empower us to preserve our hearts, minds, bodies, time and sanity.
Module 2 Master Boundary Concepts

Gain clarity on what boundaries are, and what they aren’t. Learn why boundaries are an act of love and compassion for yourself and everyone around you. You’ll master :

  • foundational concepts of why boundaries are your super power in the fight against relationship imbalances
  • identifying areas where your boundaries are strong, and where they need additional work for your personal health and over-all well being.
Module 3: Personal Self-care boundaries

<strong>You can't skip this part: Your personal values, beliefs and rights for your own self-care and safety are at the core of your boundary tool kit.</strong>
<li>You’ll map out how you can tune into <strong>your own sense</strong> of what’s right and wrong for you, and what you need in any moment.</li>
<li>We’ll look at <strong>who’s responsible</strong>,  for what, when it comes to other people.</li>
<li>You’ll learn how to <strong>step away from stressful conversations and situations</strong> in a healthy way that respects yourself, and others, and how to <strong>encourage win-win solutions when there’s conflict.</strong></li>

Module 4: Boundaries with others

You’ll take a personal look at where most boundary offenses happen with your partner, and validate how it really affects you, and what you need to happen for you instead.

  • Learn what the most important boundary is with a sexually addicted person
  • The most common boundary offenses :  dishonesty, trickle disclosure, gaslighting, blame, deflecting, defensiveness and others, and how to set and enforce boundaries around those behaviors.
  • Answer the question, “What can I have a boundaries around?” and think through what you’re willing to enforce, deal breakers, and things you’ll be patient with.
  • You’ll be asked to think about all the major dimensions of your life that need boundaries, and get dozens of examples of typical boundaries around recovery from betrayal, deception and the effects of other's  addiction.
Module 5: Prepare to live in a safe, sane and boundaried life

Here’s where most people get stuck: what do I do when a boundary is crossed?

  • Instead of trying to think it through in the moment, you’ll use my worksheets to make a plan for a range of options to help you feel validated, supported and protected when you need to enforce your boundaries after a violation.
  • You’ll be inspired to ramp up your self-care in ways you may not have considered yet.

Here’s another place most people are caught off guard: dealing with pushback on your boundaries.

  • You’ll discover the most common pushback and have your self-protective yet loving and compassionate responses ready in advance.
  • You’ll learn that you can empathize with the discomfort your partner feels from your enforcement, yet and still hold your boundaries firmly.
Module 6: Use Your Capital “V” Voice to communicate your boundaries

You’ll use your Voice to be seen, heard and known for exactly what’s going on with you, and what your needs are.

  • Use my bullet-proof fill-in-the-blank 5 sentence formula worksheet that becomes your script to master boundary statements made with love and care for others, without guilt
  • You’ll hold people accountable for their problematic behavior in a calm and loving way.
  • You’ll get clear on, and communicate specifically what you need to see from your partner (and others) to give them access to you and your heart. 
  • You’ll also learn to make requests in a way that puts the focus on you, your feelings, and your needs, that leaves no room for the recipient to accuse you of blaming, belligerence or being controlling.
Module 7: Ultimate self-care – Enforcing your boundaries

In a perfect world, we wouldn’t need boundaries, but the reality is people cross those lines either intentionally or un-intentionally.

It’s our right and responsibility to protect ourselves with boundaries and help those people learn what the natural result of their behavior is, for their own good and ours. Enforcing is never easy but allowing the violation to continue is even less comfortable.

  • You’ll learn how to validate your own feelings and reality, identify your needs, and enact the plan you made in Module 5.
  • You’ll learn the importance of documenting the behavior of your sexually addicted partner and why that’s important data about the health of your relationship, and their commitment to putting the relationship ahead of their addiction.

Here's what you get

when you enroll

When you enroll during this special limited time period you’ll get:

* Lifetime Access to 7 Deep Dive Modules showing you literally everything you need to do, to craft boundaries that fit your values and needs for physical and emotional safety, serenity, and good mental health in your relationship with your sexually addicted spouse (and everyone else!) Video, Audio and Transcripts so you can learn in your own time and ways that are best for you.

* Worksheets with scripts, examples and suggestions that help you tailor your boundaries and sanctuaries to your own personal values, lifestyle, and needs.

* A safe, active and highly supportive private Facebook group community with fellow students and alumni to make sure you get unstuck in a matter of minutes instead of days or weeks. You'll have immediate access to this community as soon as you enroll, and for the duration of the 8-week session.

* A space to over-come isolation and constantly refill your validation and motivation tank by connection with other women who “get” the journey and are here to help you master the power of boundaries and self-care

Here's the Bonuses You Get

when you enroll now

When you enroll during this special limited time period you’ll get these bonuses to ease your journey to your boundary goals:

  • 8 weeks of live Q and A sessions Monday and Wednesday ( 16 sessions) to make sure you get your burning questions answered and can move forward with total clarity and confidence. Can't make it live? Watch the video recordings on your own time. ($1000 Value)
  • Once a week I'll invite up to 4 members to come on the "Heart Seat" - my own "hot seat" of sorts,  where we do a deep dive into a roadblock live. We'll record these sessions, so you can watch later if you can't make the live session.  ($1000 value)
  • The Healing Work of Nature and Trauma -  A 60 minute educational video by Maureen Calamia, a workshop leader and author of  "Creating Luminous Spaces".  Maureen is passionate about the role of nature in our lives. She specializes in bringing nature into all aspects of our lives though biophillic design and advises us on how to best nature in our self-care plan. ($399 Value)
  • Body Awareness and Care - Bryn Merida will lead us in a 90 minute education on how trauma is stored in the body and how we can become more aware of our body, what our body is telling us we need, and how to respond to bring more peace, serenity and control to our lives. ($299 Value)


    Total value of these bonuses: $2698

14 day guarentee (1)

Plus you’ll be backed by a

Risk-Free 14 day guarantee

Let me say this up front:

Boundaries for safety and peace is the most comprehensive, step-by-step education and experience program for spouses of sexually addicted people who are highly motivated and COMMITTED to learn the best proven methods of using boundaries to regain their personal power and get out of relationship limbo.

My groups are carefully crafted with their own boundaries, that make sure only encouragement, validation and growth are the focus of all conversations. (I'm trained by Door of Hope Peer Facilitation and have over 20 years experience running online groups.)

Now here’s the kicker.

By the end of 14 days, you’ll have received access to a pre-implementation runway” and 2 modules.

Meaning, you’ve had the opportunity to validate that your goals for your boundaries growth are in line with what’s taught in this course.

If you don’t feel totally validated in your values and motivated by your boundaries work in this course (and your ability to craft your own boundaries, reach out and show me you’ve put in the work and I'll refund your investment. You have nothing to lose and only empowerment to gain.  Full details here >>

The Questions I Get...

If you’re thinking “this sounds amazing but I’m still not 100% sure”...


You should give Boundaries for Safety and Peace a 14 day risk-free shot if you’re motivated by any of the following:

-> You want your life back…like…really badly.

Whether it’s the past wounds or the in-your-face day to day feeling of disconnection caused by your partner’s painful behaviors, you’re fully aware that something is wrong in your relationship and want to know if it can be made right again. Get out of limbo.

-> More importantly, your energy and hope is being zapped and you know you can’t maintain this limbo for too much longer, much less the rest of your life.

You value your relationship and your peace, and you’re motivated beyond measure to invest the next 2 months in crafting and enforcing boundaries that give you really good information about  whether or not your partner can become a safe person for you again. If he can , validate you, connect to you, able to reassure you in a way that can dramatically alter your ability to feel safe and at peace in your own home, with your relationship as your home base.

Its Time



I personally cannot wait

to guide you over these next 8 weeks…

Learning to create, communicate and enforce boundaries in my marriage to my (now in a good recovery) sexually addicted spouse has literally transformed my life in ways I never dreamed of. 

Most importantly, I learned whether my marriage was salvageable or not. I had to know that I tried absolutely everything in my power, to give my husband a chance to choose recovery. Some do, some don’t, but I had to know either way. That knowledge is power.

I’ve experienced first-hand what it feels like to cycle through discovery, recovery, and relapse of my beloved husband’s sex addiction, feeling like I only had two options: Stay and hope for the best as my hope diminished each cycle, or choose divorce. I’ve also experienced the transition from diminished hope and feeling of disempowerment, to one of being at the helm of my thoughts, feelings and actions with the full confidence that I would protect my own values and heart from the harmful behavior of others – whatever it takes and look forward to the results.

If you’re in a committed relationship with a sexually addicted person, you owe it yourself to at least take the risk-free plunge to see what your life with healthy boundaries to protect you in all aspects of your life looks like.


More than anything else, I want to share that with you today.

To experience firsthand, the self-worth, confidence, and peace that healthy boundaries provide, and to take real, tangible steps to transforming the lives of everyone you’re in close contact with.

Should you choose to accept my invitation, I personally guarantee that these next 8 weeks will be completely and utterly life changing for you and your family.

I look forward to meeting you personally inside Boundaries for Peace and Safety.

All my best,


Its Time



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